what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Pants are for mortals
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
