is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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