we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
