You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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