Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
