i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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