I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
