I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
