Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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