I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
