i think my mom watched the whole time
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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