bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize