There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
