Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize