New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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