Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize