walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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