he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
