She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
