so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
