I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
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