Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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