We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize