Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
