My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
