My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
