guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
