The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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