i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
