I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
