I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
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