don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
