i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
not ubering you a puppy
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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