they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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