She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
