These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
you will always have a special place in my vag
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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