Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
