So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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