Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
