My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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