That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
