Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
