Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
My feet surprised me
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