You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
