That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
