i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
