I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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