Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
as a side note pls kill me
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
