it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
