I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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