i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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